Snarky Campaign Slogan Contest

My friends at The Democratic Strategist have for a while now been running at the top of their home page a picture of an Etch-a-Sketch containing the words, “Romney: you may not agree with what he says but you can trust him to deny he ever said it.”

That’s good. And it’s the kind of snarky wit we need more of in American campaigns, which tend to veer between the two great, awful, American registers, namely Midwestern Nice and moralized outrage—or sometimes American Jeremiad, an art form which by platypusing the worst aspects of both those registers manages at once to voice optimism, or at best Christian hope, and self-righteousness.

So: I hereby solicit candidates for the best snarky campaign slogan. Entries may be original or may quote somebody else, but if the latter please give proper credit. The goal is not a campaign slogan that would actually be effective—which would almost certainly require less snark—but shivviness: cruelty, humor (or better, humour), and the shock of recognition that comes from naming a truth, or at least an effective partisan accusation.

I have my own suggestion: “Vote GOP: it’s great to have a party of old people led by children.” If you can do better than that, please do.

[Slogans from the other side are welcome too, and I hope I can take a joke at my team’s own expense. Try to top this, as you probably can: “Vote Obama. Because a nice speech makes unemployment all better.”]

The winner will receive eternal fame in this space, and a gift certificate for a Heffalump. The contest ends Wednesday at noon, Pacific time.

[Cross-posted at The Reality-based Community]

Andrew Sabl

Andrew Sabl is a Visiting Professor in the Program on Ethics, Politics, and Economics and in Political Science at Yale University.