First up from the God Machine this week is a word from on high as to who will win the 2012 presidential election.

Most of us will have to rely on polling, projections, trends, and some guesswork, at least until the first Tuesday in November, but radical TV preacher Pat Robertson claims to have a direct line to the divine. This week, the televangelist told his national television audience that God whispered the election results in his ear.

“I spent the better part of a week in prayer and just saying, ‘God show me something,’ some things I’ll share with you. I think he showed me the next president but I’m not supposed to talk about that so I’ll leave you in the dark — probably just as well — I think I’ll know who it will be.”

I especially liked the part in which Robertson said he’s “not supposed to talk about that” — as if God spoke directly to the radical TV preacher and said, “OK, I’ll tell you, Pat, but don’t go spreading it around.”

Robertson also told his viewers that God believes President Obama “holds a radical view” of the nation’s direction. So there you have it — pay no attention to the historians and political scientists who note that Obama’s agenda has deep roots in the ideologies of both parties going back generations; Pat Robertson heard the opposite directly from God.

Also from the God Machine this week:

* State lawmakers in Tennessee are working on anti-bullying laws, but want to create a loophole that will allow religious youths to pick on gays.

* Gabino Zavala, an assistant bishop of the Roman Catholic archdiocese of Los Angeles, was forced to resign this week after acknowledging that he has two teenage children. Roman Catholic clergy, of course, are supposed to be celibate.

* Speaking of the Roman Catholic Church, Chicago’s Cardinal Francis George apologized this week for comparing an annual gay rights parade to a Ku Klux Klan rally.

* And an entity called the Church of Kopimism, focused on electronic file-sharing, has been officially recognized as a religion by the Swedish government. (thanks to R.P. for the tip)

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Follow Steve on Twitter @stevebenen. Steve Benen is a producer at MSNBC's The Rachel Maddow Show. He was the principal contributor to the Washington Monthly's Political Animal blog from August 2008 until January 2012.