Columbia has a terrible football team. The school lost 44 football games in a row the 1980s. Columbia’s record in the last seven years is 15-45. Its Ivy League record is even worse.

Back in 2011 the school’s marching band was even suspended for performing this song at the Cornell game (which Columbia, of course, lost):

We always lose lose lose

by a lot and sometimes by a little

we all were winners at the start,

but four years has taught us all the value of

just giving up, cuz we really suck

why are we even trying?

we always lose lose lose

but we take solace in our booze.

But then, it is Columbia. Unlike the situation at, say, Texas A & M, Columbia football’s record was really more a matter of amusement rather than actual embarrassment. More football wins sure wouldn’t improve the school’s reputation.

On some level it was even a point of pride, at least among nerds or Columbia alumni. Maybe the football players are just nice guys focused on their studies. How important are college football wins, really? Maybe they deserve some respect for that.

Not really. Bad at sports maybe. Nice guys, not so much, Deadspin:

NBC broke the news that New York police had charged sophomore defensive end Chad Washington with aggravated harassment as a hate crime. According to police, Washington and a group of friends taunted an Asian student with racial slurs before Washington pinned the victim against a wall.

The charges against Washington didn’t sting the team as much as did a gaggle of player tweets unearthed on Wednesday by WKCR, the campus radio station.


An offensive lineman retweeted an article about New York’s growing Jewish population with the hashtag “fuckkkkkk.” A running back tweeted, “You show me a nigga that takes a bath and I’ll show you a faggot.” The former quarterback and team captain replied to another with “shut up fagasaurus rex.” And Washington himself tweeted, “When Asian ppl fall alseep in class the teachers can’t tell! Lol.”

Just because you suck at football doesn’t mean you can’t also display the repellent stereotypes of dumb jocks. [Image via]

Daniel Luzer

Daniel Luzer is the news editor at Governing Magazine and former web editor of the Washington Monthly. Find him on Twitter: @Daniel_Luzer