THE RETURN OF JOHN BOLTON….Great. Now that lunatic Jack D. Ripper wannabe John Bolton has sworn off appearances in the New York Times, he shows up on my doorstep instead. Thanks a lot, Nick. Shorter Bolton: If Barack Obama gave a speech praising mothers as the glue that holds America together, I’d write a turgid op-ed essay arguing that Obama shows a dangerous inability to grasp that it’s really our unique dedication to uncompromising militarism that holds America together. Oh, and what’s more, Obama obviously doesn’t understand the meaning of the words mother, glue, hold and America. Nyah nyah.

Which just goes to show: it’s not just bloggers who can write incoherent screeds while munching Cheetos in their underwear. Guys in suits and ties on our nation’s premier op-ed pages can do it too.