MITCH MCCONNELL’S ALTERNATE UNIVERSE…. Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell (R-Ky.) chatted with ABC News today, and talked about his expectations for the near future.

“I think if we have a larger number of Republicans [after the midterm elections], it will hopefully move him to the political center, which is the way he ran in ’08, but not the way he’s governed since then. And hopefully, if he moves to the center or the right of center, we can to do business.”

I wish I could understand why McConnell perceives President Obama as being more liberal than Candidate Obama. I honestly can’t think of a single issue in which this is true, making McConnell’s complaints that much more bizarre.

But let’s also not forget how McConnell defines “moving to the center” — every idea considered by the Senate “is going to have to be center-right.”

McConnell went on to say a policy that allows tax cuts for the wealthy to expire — the way the plan was devised by Republicans including Mitch McConnell — would hurt small businesses, which is demonstrably false.

But that, of course, raises the obvious question: if McConnell is so concerned about small businesses, why doesn’t he allow a vote on a small-business-incentives bill?

McConnell said the small-business jobs bill the president is pushing for “may” pass later this month, but cautioned that “it shouldn’t be oversold.”

“There is a little itty-bitty small business bill that no one thinks will have much of an impact on the economy, because they want to stick into it a too-big-to-fail provision and did stick it in. But the larger question is that business is sitting there, hoarding cash because they are concerned of the health care taxes, the health care mandates, the tax increases that are coming in September potentially.”

I’ll concede that McConnell’s point about the scope of the small-business bill isn’t unreasonable — it’s a fairly modest bill. Of course, if it’s just a “little itty-bitty” piece of legislation, McConnell a) shouldn’t fight so hard to kill it; b) could let the Senate actually vote on it; and c) should work with Dems to make it bigger and more ambitious — a step McConnell refuses to consider.

But the rest of his analysis is nonsense. Businesses aren’t “sitting there” because of health care; they’re sitting there waiting for the Senate to actually pass legislation that helps them. Indeed, McConnell has it backwards — new reports continue to prove that the Affordable Care Act will help, not hurt, employers, especially small businesses.

The Senate is a dysfunctional mess now; I shudder to think what the institution would be like if the Confused Kentuckian were the Majority Leader.

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Follow Steve on Twitter @stevebenen. Steve Benen is a producer at MSNBC's The Rachel Maddow Show. He was the principal contributor to the Washington Monthly's Political Animal blog from August 2008 until January 2012.