Two Centuries of Tributes to Karl Marx

This item might normally fall within the rubric of don’t-write-about-random-crazy-people-saying-crazy-things, but it comes reeking onto my browser from a reasonably prominent conservative blog (Gateway Pundit), and what the hell, it’s Friday afternoon. So check it out:

You just can’t make this stuff up.

Barack Obama will officially launch his 2012 re-election campaign on Karl Marx’s birthday. Freedom Post reported:

“Obama will officially launch his 2012 re-election campain, and no I’m not kidding, on Karl Marx’s birthday, May 5th! First, we learn that Earth Day was started on the birthday of Vladimir Lenin, the Communist butcher and founder of the USSR, now we learn that Barack Obama, America’s first Marxist president, is launching his campaign on the father of communism’s birthday? Come on, now. This is just too appropriate! How fitting!”

Now one might note that May 5 commemorates a slightly better-known event than Marx’s birthday (hint: it’s celebrated in bars all over America), though perhaps conservative bloggers don’t know about it or consider it a celebration of illegal immigration or the socialist expropriation of oil company wealth or something. Where I come from, May 5 is probably better known as the birthday of Tammy Wynette than of Karl Marx.

But let’s play along. What are some of the other events in American history that might have been secret or not-so-secret tributes to the birth of the author of Das Kapital? Let’s see (source of events is HistoryOrb.com; the italicized comments are all my own):

* 1847: American Medical Association organized (first step towards ObamaCare).

* 1862: Cinco de Mayo (discussed above; socialist revolution aimed at destroying America through illegal immigration).

* 1865: First U.S. Train Robbery (Looters! Looters!).

* 1886: Bay View Massacre in Milwaukee; National Guardsmen kill seven people participating in protest demanding eight-hour work day (Union Bosses incite violence, promote unconstitutional legislation).

* 1893: NY Stock Exchange crashes (Marxist sabotage!).

* 1920: Woodrow Wilson bans Communist Labor Party (diversionary tactics by father of Progressivism).

* 1921: 1st ranger for Cleveland Metroparks hired (environmental terrorists thwart economic growth).

* 1942: US begins rationing sugar during World War II (socialist New Deal administration destroys free market to aid Soviet ally).

* 1949: KGO TV channel 7 in San Francisco, CA (ABC) begins broadcasting (liberal broadcast media launched)

* 1957: Betsy Rawls wins LPGA Peach Blossom Golf Open (Feminazis invade clubhouses!)

* 1959: KNME TV channel 5 in Albuquerque, NM (PBS) begins broadcasting (Self-explanatory).

* 1969: Pulitzer Prize awarded to Normal Mailer for Armies of the Night (could have been Stalin Prize).

* 1971: Race riot in Brownsville section of Brookyln (where was Sharpton?)

* 1978: Cincinnati Red Pete Rose becomes 14th player to get 3,000 hits (Reds! Reds!)

* 1987: Congress begins Iran-Contra hearings (and persecution of Oliver North)

* 1997: “Married With Children” final episode on Fox TV (and the Homosexual Agenda advances).

Yes, it’s plain now that the Obama re-election launch on May 5 is just the latest in nearly two centuries of tributes to Karl Marx on his birthday. Yet none dare call it treason.

Ed Kilgore

Ed Kilgore, a Monthly contributing editor, is a columnist for the Daily Intelligencer, New York magazine’s politics blog, and the managing editor for the Democratic Strategist.