Got up this morning expecting hordes of conservatives in the streets raising a primitive, bone-chilling war cry: the election is over because of the Pew Poll! The Pew Poll! Instead saw liberals running for the hills in terror! Panic! Panic! And I want to say, Get a grip, people!

So to capture the ridiculous atmosphere, here’s David Bowie performing “Panic in Detroit” in Tokyo in 1990:

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Ed Kilgore, a contributing editor of the Washington Monthly, is a columnist for New York.